I was in a similar situation

paying all the bills doing all the worrying and my husband being mainly clueless to what all was going what we owe to who and what our monthly “budget” is. I told him that I had to have his input and his understanding. He has known we had a lot of bills and he knew of all the accounts — but basically he was happy to be blissfully unaware of how tight things are. He always would complain every payday if there was not enough money for the things he wanted to buy but he had refused to talk about it or help me with it. We both agree that he is too busy to do the actual bill paying and the last time we tried that we had to pay a lot of late fees because he didn’t get the bills paid on time. Anyway, it helped me a lot to put down all the money we owe, the house, the car, the credit cards and the loan. That way he could see it in black and white. On another sheet I put down the functional monthly budget.
We found out we are just barely breaking even and mainly we got the credit card debt because of lack of savings & having too many emergencies. We didn’t save and we overspent. It is a big relief that he is willing to participate in Dave’s Money Makeover plan. I expect resistance from him at Christmas time. But after initially arguing with me about starting the savings first — he now agrees and sees that is mostly why we got so much debt. We never seem to have money put aside when something breaks or needs repair. We had a water heater break, plumbing repairs, truck repairs, etc. etc., even a very expensive electrical problem with the house all this year — but the debt is 4 years worth of it so it is big. I guess I just mainly nds to participate in the budget decisions too not just leave it all up to us! After the 3rd “talk” my husband agreed to sit down before every payday with me and negotiate how it’s all going to be spent and saved. I hope yours will too.

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